web analytics

{An Excerpt}

Posted on: November 18th, 2011 by Hannah Beasley 40 Comments

{I’m trying to decide on a title – it was originally A Day of Darkness and Not of Light, but that’s really long and somewhat clumsy. I’ve been thinking about naming it Ten Thousand Shall Fall or And the Earth Wept…thoughts?}

*Note – this is set in a medieval type world, and the people of the land are pagan, worshipping foreign gods. The Southern tribes, quiet and still for many years, are now gathering like a storm and come marching forward to do battle with the lands of the North. Joash and his mother live virtually alone in their part of Kearjath-Jearim, southern land on the border of Maakah, the land of the enemy southern tribes. Kearjath-Jearim, a once-noble nation, fell many years ago to the enemy, and part of it now belongs to them. It is without king and without many inhabitants.*

Joash arrived at the fortress a day later, having ridden hard and fast to reach the place of safety. A thick stone wall surrounded the fort, rising tall and gray out of the ground. High upon its turrets and walkways were soldiers dressed in the dark armor of Danram, swords sheathed at their sides. There came no noise from inside. All was still and quiet, as though the land was hushed in fear. The sun was rising in the East, its pale rays slipping across the hard walls of Anath. As Joash and his horse galloped the last half-mile to the broad gate, he saw the guards speaking with one another and shouting orders until the gate slowly began to open, admitting Joash and his exhausted horse. He was safe.

The men there confirmed his worst fears – the tribes of Maakah were moving on them. Yet when he told the leader then of his intent to return home and take his mother and friend, he was told he would not be allowed to. “It would be death to attempt such a thing,” Captain Grader said. “I am sorry. You will leave with a party of soldiers and other refugees for the safe haven of Ramath-Gilead. The news of the enemy must be given to the King.”

Black fear clouded Joash’s eyes as he clenched his teeth and replied, “Please, sir, let me go. I am a fast rider, I would be back in less than a day!”

“I will say no more,” the captain said, turning and walking away. Joash closed his eyes, his chest heaving as he thought of his mother, so loving and beautiful, left alone to the mercy of the dark enemy. Opening his eyes, he broke lose from the grasp of one of the soldiers and ran after the captain.

“Please!” he screamed, pounding along the upper wall of the fortress, trying to catch the man. Behind him he heard the heavy footsteps of the soldiers running after him. “Please! Don’t let them die! Please, I beg you! Let me go!” He felt strong arms grab him and force him to the ground, pining him still. “Let me go! Let me go! My mother, please!”

The captain turned to his aide. “Get this boy inside, quiet him down. The people need not hear this. There will be all too much slaughter – and there is nothing I can do.”

His screams muffled by hands covering his mouth, Joash was half carried, half dragged away as the sun of the second day rose in the sky.


Night was closing in as Miriam stood at her doorway, watching the sun set. She caught sight of a figure running toward her. could it be be Joash? she wondered hopefully. No, it was Darren.

“Has he come?” Darren gasped when he reached her door.

“No, he has not.” Miriam turned quickly, hiding her face that the tears on it would not be seen. She did not yet know if Joash had even reached the fortress in safety.

“He should be back,” muttered the old man. “It’s been two days, the ride would not take him so long.”

So they waited, watching the final sunset and looking for Miriam’s son. And he did not return with the morning sun, but there did come a darkness, an eternal darkness that would not soon be gone.

Sorry for the long excerpt. =P I was having trouble finding something short that wouldn’t be totally confusing! =D Do you want to see more excerpts, or was one enough? =D


40 Responses

  1. Eve says:

    I loved it!!! Your writing is amazing, and the story really engaging! :)

  2. Hannah says:

    Thanks Eve!! =D I’m so glad you liked it!! =D

  3. Rachel Hipps says:

    I like the title Ten Thousand Shall Fall. I think it sounds interesting. :) I like the way you write and the story sounds awesome!

  4. Hannah says:

    Thanks Rachel! =D

  5. rah-sb.com says:

    KBS2バラエティー『大国民トークショー、アンニョンハセヨ』に出演したKARAのハラとギュリが、ステージ衣装とは全く違うファッションを披露し注目を集めた普段から優れた美貌とファッショナブルなスタイルで話題を集めているハラは、この日ホワイトブラックのストライプブラウスにホワイトスキニーパンツを合わせ、ラブリーな魅力を発散させた。さらにおでこを全て出したポニーテールヘアスタイルで爽やかさまでプラスした一方、“女神”と呼ばれているギュリは、星柄のブラウスにショートパンツを合わせ元気溌剌なファッションを完成させた二人がチョイスしたブラウスは、ブランド「LUCKY CHOUETTE」のもので、スカートに合わせてもパンツに合わせても女性らしさが引き立つデザインが特徴。ステレオポニー に似ているアーティスト

  6. seo988.com says:

    20代の女の子にとって、エッジスタイルの創造主でありたい。ファッションに迷いがちな女の子を導くように力強いオーラを放っているのが、「VENCE EXCHANGE(ヴァンスエクスチェンジ)」です。ストリートファッションの持つアクティブさもありながら、モード系らしい保守的な姿勢も感じられるヴァンスは、まさにヴィンテージ感すら出しているブランドでもあります。ガーリーであることよりもボーイッシュであることえを選んだ数少ないブランドですから、カッコイイファッションを目指している女性にはピッタリでしょうLAスタイルのデニムは、絶対に履きこなしたい重要アイテムです。シルエット感にもこだわった洋服は、どれも魅力的なラインナップになりました。トレンドのデニムシャツは、いろんなテイストのスカートと合わせて相性を試してみたい。大胆なプリントのインナーは、街中の女の子の視線を集めてしまいそう。人気ファッションビル・渋谷でも話題沸騰中の、人気ブランドです!VICTORIA’S SECRETのファッションショーでパフォーマンスへ

  7. ハット メンズ 帽子 中折れハット パナマハット☆NEW YOEK HAT Panama Junior 2146☆流行のスタイルを取り入れつつもベーシックなスタイルのカッコよさにコアなファンも多いニューヨークハットからパナマハットのご紹介です。エクアドル産本パナマを使った職人による手編みのパナマハットです。艶感や香り 素材の品質などペーパーや他のストローハットとはやはり一味違った高.メンズ ファッションのスポーツウェア

  8. シルエット, ファッション, 男性 クリップアートベクター

  9. ファッション, 作りなさい, の上, 美しさ, 女の子, 肖像画, 保有物, カラフルである, Lollipop ストックフォト

  10. ローレン”の紺ブレにスキニーなデニムハイヒール。バッグは“ルイ・ヴィトン”や“ハンティング・ワールド”のボストン。そんな時代でした。でも、このスタイルって、もしかして「今」?たとえば56ページ右上のカリスマエディター三尋木奈保さんの装いを見てみてください。懐かしくも新鮮!大人の女性の気分は、「バック・トゥ・オリジン」……そう、原点回帰なのかもしれません。

  11. マリエはヌードカラーのセットアップをマニッシュに着こなし、ターコイズのピアスを差し色に。足元は同じくヌードカラーのパンプスを合わせ女性らしさを際立たせたCrystal Kayはタイトなレザーのミニワンピースにサンダル、バングル、クラッチバックをすべてブラックで統一し、クールかつセクシーにまとめているマリエは11年9月にニューヨークの名門美術大学「Parsons The New School for Design(パーソンズ美術大学)」に入学。およそ1年間に渡って現地で本格的にファッションデザインを学び、昨年7月に帰国した。(モデルプレス)元の記事を読むNY発ファッションブランド「マーク ジェイコブス」が展開する『BOOKMARC』が遂に日本上陸

  12. upchn.com says:


  13. swing2me.com says:

    「GALAXY Note 3」が提唱するファッションとビジネスを両立するアンバサダー冨永愛さんと、人気ファッション雑誌『SPUR』が今回のキャンペーンのためだけにセレクトしたスタイリッシュな限定オリジナルカバーが手に入るチャンスこの4つのデザインをそれぞれ700名にプレゼントするほか、S Viewカバーを7色からご希望の色を200名にプレゼント、計3,000名に当たるキャンペーンです応募するには、サムスンの公式Facebookに「いいね!」をして、こちらから今すぐ!

  14. メリハリを付けることは、やせて見せるための絶対的法則。まずは温かくしたいのは「トップス」か「ボトム」かを、選択しよう。ダボッとした大きめなセーターをザックリと着たら、ボトムはレギンスやタイツ、あるいはスキニージーンズで締めるとバランスも◎逆に、ピタッとしたトップスを着るならロングスカートや緩めのパンツなどを合わせるとやせて着こなせますよベルト法則

  15. この展示会はアジアから社以上が集まり、色々なバイヤーさんと商談する場所です。私は震災からヶ

  16. 10,783円「Price Down」スタイリッシュノースリーブ配色ワンピース[通勤服・クール・万能ワンピ・とろみ質感・結婚式・異素材ドツキング・シャツワンピース・ロングカットソー・コットン・ロングワンピース・妊婦服] lu 984_1

  17. シューズ、バッグ、アクセサリー、ストール など: 2,000

  18. qdsnfz.com says:


  19. その1:ブランドにこだわりすぎる女性

  20. 人間関係をスムーズにするヒントやライフハック、節約ネタなど、今すぐ役立つ情報が詰まったPeachyの「ライフスタイル」カテゴリこのカテゴリのなかから、2013年2月7日2月13日の間に最も多く読まれた記事TOP3をご紹介します!

  21. それと前髪を取る量が少ないと厚みが出ずスカスカして野暮ったい感じになりますので美容師さんと相談してくださいね☆

  22. ボトムス・・・4000円

  23. There is no inherent reason for an item of clothing, for example a skirt, to be considered feminine. Roland Barthes, in his book The Diseases of Costume, writes of theatrical dress as a kind of language in which the basic element is the sign (Lurie, 1992, p3). This statement can be expanded to include all elements of dress away from the theatre. If clothing is a sign therefore, it must be given a meaning and this meaning, as with all signs, is constructed. For example, society has identified the skirt as a signifier of femininity, which has been reinforced through repeated exposure (both through the media and on the street) to images of women in skirts and men in trousers. The fact that the gender signification of this garment has altered indicates that fashion, just like gender itself, is a social construction, with fashion items becoming loaded signs. If our appearance is an accumulation of signs then we each reveal something about ourselves through our choice of garments; clothing becomes a reflection of our identity. Whilst fashion does allow women to experiment with their image and different ways of portraying femininity, as something primarily constructed for the male gaze it still confines women to a choice between constructed female identities (Barnard, 1996, p140).

  24. Fashion can certainly be used to parody, subvert and deconstruct gender identities (particularly the feminine), however, in the mainstream, it can only ever reflect the social conscious behind it. If society is not ready for men to wear skirts, then skirts will not be bought by the majority of men. Whilst designers like Jean Paul Gaultier can attempt to deconstruct gender stereotypes through fashion, many of these subversions can still be read as supporting the distinction between gender identities. Fashion and dress is influenced by both the body itself and the range of signs that it refers to, making it difficult to determine where fashion ends and social consciousness begins.

  25. The ‘gaze’ plays a significant role in the maintenance of the male/female binary and as such the separation of gender identities. The ‘gaze’ (that is, the act of looking at and objectifying the opposite sex) is considered predominantly masculine, with many images of women in the media being constructed for the male audience (Barnard, 1996, p140). However when a man is the subject of the gaze the binary is not destroyed, as merely reversing the act of ‘looking’ and being ‘looked at’ does not alter the active/passive, male/female binary. These must be transcended in order to begin breaking down the distinction between gender identities (Barnard, 1996, p140). As such fashion, by encouraging the male gaze and helping to define masculine from feminine is supporting the male/female binary. Cross dressing is one way of making it especially clear that this male/female binary exists.

Leave a Reply